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Hello! :) Welcome to my blog,
A humble little space on net.
You'll find me screaming about
my life and my joys and sorrow :D
Like it, love it, if not leave it.


JUNHE
25th Feb 92'
EVPS,CCHY,NYJC


Dream a little dream
  • TOUR around the world
  • Finish damn 'A's
  • learn Guan & saxophone
  • 回到过去



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    Saturday, February 26, 2011
    _______________________________________


    As always - the day you've made your choice, I know that it's nvr possible for us to be like before. So let's live on.


    LOVE the CLIQUE 5:52 AM

    Wednesday, September 01, 2010
    _______________________________________


    What I wanna say is just:

    WHY NOT TRY BEING ME?


    LOVE the CLIQUE 12:59 AM

    Tuesday, August 31, 2010
    _______________________________________


    I know this is random.
    Eventually, I just have to face everyone, every questions, every fault, and you guys.
    Returning back to school probably will be a start for that, I hope.
    I'll just have to live better. It will just prepare me for the worst to come?
    Should really start sorting my brain, my feelings, my life, everything around or within me. But somehow I got no idea where to start from.
    Maybe someday, I will?
    I dunno what will happen tmr, how will I react, what will I say but I still hope for the best.
    Do your best yea?

    Humans nature- contradictory? I'm no exception.
    Paradoxically, I will still be there for you, the both of you.


    LOVE the CLIQUE 2:29 AM

    Tuesday, August 24, 2010
    _______________________________________


    Live on JH.
    You know you will and you must.
    I will definitely live better.

    Similarly to me or to you guys, I have already lost it.
    It will be a great start out for me for a new life.
    Nth hinders me anymore.
    Neither of you.


    LOVE the CLIQUE 11:30 PM

    Monday, August 16, 2010
    _______________________________________


    Know wat? I'm more than jus disappointed in you.
    U Changed so much that i dun recognise you?
    "does it matter?", won't u care to pass a better remark?
    this aimless and lost one..
    U wanna continue like this? So be it.. Probably I was the one interfering, hindering your thoughts all along. One sided wish? I thought to myself: "hey, got to work hard for our future. one day i'm gonna make sure i can give you more than what any other guys can." I don't mind waiting.. And I believe I can do it. I dun have to be with you now.
    but you know what really pisses me off?

    YOUR SELFISHNESS.

    Frankly, from the beginning till now, you are still selfish.
    You thought of having all the care and concern that u yearn to have,
    You know what you told,gave and do to me?
    Its either I'm catching the wrong "signals", in fact, you were jus trying to have fun and make me a fool.
    You do what you want recklessly, you din give a damn about ppl who care for you. NO ONE! Not even a single one, neither your bff.
    Probably you din change or I changed that now I have a whole new perspective on you.
    Maybe all along your "I want what I want" attitude overwrites every single thing.
    As a friend, I really dunno what can I say.. u just dun heed anybody's words.
    not even melia.

    God damn it, i dunno what words to use on you that I can only say that you are just lowering your status as a girl, human. Which obviously implies - Cheap.
    If you think thats cos you are with him thats why it makes me feel this way? Sry to disappoint you, definitely not. You know what you did before in everywhere, anywhere, to whom or whoever. I can simply wash my hands off.. still I was just hoping that you could find a way out, did you think about it? or you just wanna sway along with the wind.

    Be it if you wanna think that i'm the villain here, I am use to being accuse as one~
    Take it or leave it. To be honest you are just arrogant and wanna be superior. Frankly, I do really see the link why both of you use to be best frens. It just happens that both of you react to matters in the same way. If you wanna continue as you are, then one day your traumas will simply return AGAIN. Whatever you fear towards r/s, it will happen again even if it is the one that you are in now. You won't wanna take this bet with me. Similarly, you will just lose every single one beside you, even if there are anybody by your side- who are the true/real ones?
    You get the same treatment back on how you treat others.

    You know what makes you diff now?
    You are no longer an independent one- probably you are jus too dependent on guys? To be put it differently, you can't leave w/o a guy.
    I used to admire your character, at the same time attracted to it, an arrogant one but really knows what she wants; an individual that works really hard for her aims; have a planned ahead life; responsible-self, at the least consider about how others feel. Yet now, you are still an arrogant one but knows nth about what you want, Just aimlessly fighting for what is not necessary; a laid back self- as good as useless; always anticipating what might happen the next min- probably ends up like a beggar; Self-centered one; Of course putting yourself at the top priority. Which makes you someone really diff.

    Its either i really dunno you well that all along you are like this, or you've really change. I dun need an answer. you determine urself. You dun have to correct me, cos everyone learn from mistakes so do I, I dunno how are you gonna find fault in me. But I definitely believe that I reflect on myself, at the least better than you do.
    Last time I feel that you can comment on whatever I do, my circle of frens does. I won't really take it to heart, cos I believe 1stly- freedom of speech 2ndly- no one is perfect 3rdly- comparably you are probably wiser/mature. Now, anyone that comment on you infront of me- doesn't matter cos even a kid knows what he/she wants at the least in the short term; knows how to discern right and wrong as the grow. You- just clueless.

    Probably if you see this, you might get agitated but I can really anticipate this coming true. But if you dun learn to take ppl's comments, you won't improve. Just like how you study in school: you are being force, you are being scolded. Why not think what did you do wrong; Can i really be perfect? ; In reality, do I always get what I want?; Shld i learn to give in; Shld I learn how to stand by myself?
    Its all these small little experience that you gain which makes you grow/improve.
    Whats the use of always taking anger as the only way out to vent your emotions or blaming others for commenting,reprimand you? It all goes back to : What did i do that shld be improve?

    Just get alive, no-one, NO-one, will be by ureself every moment being your pillar. Even your partner dies.. You learn and be dependent on yourself. Whats more your bff?
    You can insist on whatever you want over this issue- Come on, u are just living in denial. She got her own life as well, when smth else comes into play, you might be the one being sacrifice instead. Its reality- face it.
    Dun expect everyone to give in to you. You might be superior infront us but doesn't mean you will be towards others. Its the attitude.

    Up to you to decide who you wanna be, what you want in your life - until then probably you will just be destroying our r/s and the CLICK' will just break off. Believe me or not~ I think I have done enough for holding all of us together. I'm really out of this. I dunno how well you know me - in a way, I never been so disappointed, upset, angry over everything before, particularly this matter.
    But since I am made to lose the frend that is most important in my life- to me there is nth that I can't lose which includes you. Probably an extreme action but if you would have made it clear to all of us probably we din have to come to such state.
    It doesn't really matter now, who knows if 10 years down the road you have become a better self? for now i doubt you will heed any of my advice. So be it..


    This is all I can do already.


    LOVE the CLIQUE 8:02 PM

    Friday, July 30, 2010
    _______________________________________


    you just made me feel like i just a make a fool out of myself.
    当自己不能得到时,却那么踊跃地争取。当你得到时,却那么残忍地不要了。你是在玩我吗?
    我真的适着去体会,了解你或他,但是到底谁适着了解我呢?!?!
    现在做出了选择,我没崔你要个答案,但你却狠心地冷漠我。
    之前不是这样的吧?我不想给你压力,或烦你,因为我知道你学业方面已经够压力,也知道你的处境不方便。仍然的我应该没有必要受到这样的待遇吧?怎么你们两都这样呢?
    是我的问题吗?
    若我离开会不会对大家都好一点?你们说呢?
    真的我宁愿你跟我说你选择他,大大好过我在这里猜你要什么。
    我只能说我很失望。若有一天以前的俊贺不存在了,想必也知道为何。
    你们让我在这件事体会了很多。
    无论在友谊或爱情里,只要谁先动情,谁就输。
    依然的,原来我们来到这世上到我们死去都只是自己孤独地走。

    我是第一次地正式追求你,也是第一次真正地去追求一个人,换来却是失望与悲伤。
    我只想利用今晚得到一个明确的答案,因为自己不想有一天因为这件事崩溃,直到有一天必须来部落各写遗书。
    无论答案如何,我都已经选择如何去面对了。


    LOVE the CLIQUE 3:13 PM

    Thursday, July 29, 2010
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    if all these things makes me a bastard, then what are you guys?


    LOVE the CLIQUE 11:21 PM